Thursday, 12 December 2013

Losing hope

I lost all hope that I can cook something good one day... :( 

Friday, 29 November 2013

SP says Foolish creatures :)

One time an atheistic svāmī remarked, "What is the use of watering the tulasī plant? It is better to water eggplant. By watering the eggplant one can get some fruits, but what is the use of watering the tulasī?" These foolish creatures, unacquainted with devotional service, sometimes play havoc with the education of people in general.

- SB 3.15.19

Foolish creatures :D

Amma


Was sick for sometime after vrindavan trip also and was under my moms love and care. Doesnt matter how much ever old you are, mom is always mom. She was treating me so much like a patient , not allowing me to carry my bag or water bottle also. She was little hesitant to speak in the reception for my admission and discharge as they gave some forms to filled n all . I had to do it but otherwise she was climbing up and down to get me juices and medicines as though she was younger. Worried about her health when I said I can manage, she said Im doing a Vaishnavi seva, why are you stopping me..huh ! At some point people learn to talk :)  More than anything she was happy that she could be with me full two days. She wanted to share or rather chit chat with me so much , that she tried to use the fullest use of it. Wish I really know what would attract her in KC to help her.

She called me yesterday saying she was not well. Neither me nor my  brother could accompany her to the hospital.To some extent she understands the situation, but she might have expected me or my brother to be with her. I felt bad. I was talking to her over phone every now and then but I Wish I be around her when she needs me.

Sunday, 24 November 2013

Was a nice day

Today was close to a perfect day. Woke at 3:15 , chanted my rounds, did MA, completed the rest of my rounds by 7:30 AM. Cooked , changed dress for JBS. Gave bath to Natabara Nitai gaur, offered, honored. Completed reading the book Many moons that I  had lended from my god brother. Attended RMM's SB class. Slept for an hour. Painted NBNG. Did Gaura arati, Made chapati, dhal for dinner. Did some grocery shopping. Now off to bed hearing Gurudev's lecture. Was a nice day.

Thank you Gurudev ! 

Thursday, 14 November 2013

My Gurudev - A Pure devotee like Bhismadev




Was reading Srimad Bhagavatam canto 1 - Chapter 9: The Passing Away of Bhīsmadeva in the Presence of Lord Krsna. One particular sloka made me vividly think about my spiritual father. SP writes in purport.

"Another point is that Bhīṣmadeva at that time was not only lying on a deathbed of arrows, but was greatly aggrieved because of that state. One should not have asked him any question at that time, but Lord Śrī Kṛṣṇa wanted to prove that His pure devotees are always sound in body and mind by dint of spiritual enlightenment, and thus in any circumstances a devotee of the Lord is in perfect order to speak of the right way of life."

No wonder my Gurudev is always in perfect order.

Jai Gurudev.



Sunday, 10 November 2013

Donts learning after Vrindavan trip

Learnt the below from the devotees by observing them not doing it

- Know your limits.People look at you wierd when u overact or over react
- Dont create sympathy (looks bad. Anyway everyone of us are dying every second)
- Try to put across things politely. Works better
- Seniors are seniors.Respect them.
- Everyone are devotees,consider treating them properly as well atleast.
- Devotees encourage you, so that you stick to KC. Dont feel proud.
- Keep your surroundings clean.
- You need not abscond to make your presence known. There are better ways.
- Gossipping - not required, especially in dham.
- Devotee committs mistakes too. Take it easy
- Being rich is not an assert for your Kc.
- Kids may not be initiated but they may be born devotees.Treat them well.


Thats it for now. Jai ho !

Friday, 1 November 2013

My big family

"We shall have one big one for you on 31. It will be the biggest i think. Do not worry."

My (god) brother messaged me the above and my (god) sister excitedly called and told me "We are all coming there to help you and you can fill the count in excel sheet" and they did it. All glories to all the devotees who came down to chennai . Had an excellent lunch and beautiful evening in the association of devotees.Gurumaharaj is very merciful on me. Such a lovely family I have.

All glories to Gurudev !

Tuesday, 29 October 2013

Higher or Lower in spiritual life

Was feeling good about the weekend damodar program we had until I spoke with my god brother. Felt tooooooo small when I heard about their mega programs. 300+ people turned up in program in an apartment.  Sunday program 175 people turn up, temple program 700+ people are lighting diyas.  Everyday  day minimum 60 people turn up in house programs. Many doing 2 pgms a day. Devotees are taking big big austerities. huh ..Where am I in the race of pleasing Gurudev ? It is not gonna be a winning game.. Slept off in the morning and dint wake up nor want to wake up for mangal arti also.

But one good thing is.. I dint feel envious. GM mail is sooo soothing that anytime I read it, I get a big smile on my face. All glories to my sweetest father. As I was thinking on this, I got a mail from Hare Krsna Quotes and it said - "In spiritual life, higher or lower is not about how much you can accomplish; higher or lower is about the purity of your motivation, the spirit of your compassion and love -RNS"

Ok ! now, Someone mercifully wants to support me by giving helping hands to do a big program and 
ouch ! I’m refusing saying I have no time to do wicks or prasad. 


Friday, 25 October 2013

Sri Madhavendra puri's DS


Reading Caitanya Caritamrita - Sri Madhavendra puri's devotional service. One particular translation which was so striking was this.

"Mādhavendra Purī smeared the sandalwood pulp over the body of Gopīnātha, and in this way he was overpowered with love of Godhead." (CC madhya 4.175)

I loved the way Srila Prabhupada used the term OVERPOWERED :)


Wednesday, 23 October 2013

Story Of Teddy

As she stood in front of her 5th grade class on the very first day of school, she told the children an untruth. Like most teachers, she looked at her students and said that she loved them all the same. However, that was impossible, because there in the front row, slumped in his seat, was a little boy named Teddy Stoddard.
Mrs. Thompson had watched Teddy the year before and noticed that he did not play well with the other children, that his clothes were messy and that he constantly needed a bath. In addition, Teddy could be unpleasant.

It got to the point where Mrs. Thompson would actually take delight in marking his papers with a broad red pen, making bold X's and then putting a big "F" at the top of his papers.

At the school where Mrs. Thompson taught, she was required to review each child's past records and she put Teddy's off until last. However, when she reviewed his file, she was in for a surprise.

Teddy's first grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is a bright child with a ready laugh. He does his work neatly and has good manners... he is a joy to be around.."

His second grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is an excellent student, well liked by his classmates, but he is troubled because his mother has a terminal illness and life at home must be a struggle."

His third grade teacher wrote, "His mother's death has been hard on him. He tries to do his best, but his father doesn't show much interest and his home life will soon affect him if some steps aren't taken."

Teddy's fourth grade teacher wrote, "Teddy is withdrawn and doesn't show much interest in school. He doesn't have many friends and he sometimes sleeps in class."

By now, Mrs. Thompson realized the problem and she was ashamed of herself. She felt even worse when her students brought her Christmas presents, wrapped in beautiful ribbons and bright paper, except for Teddy's. His present was clumsily wrapped in the heavy, brown paper That he got from a grocery bag Mrs. Thompson took pains to open it in the middle of the other presents. Some of the children started to laugh when she found a rhinestone bracelet with some of the stones missing, and a bottle that was one-quarter full of perfume.. But she stifled the children's laughter when she exclaimed how pretty the bracelet was, putting it on, and dabbing some of the perfume on her wrist. Teddy Stoddard stayed after school that day just long enough to say, "Mrs. Thompson, today you smelled just like my Mom used to." After the children left, she cried for at least an hour.

On that very day, she quit teaching reading, writing and arithmetic. Instead, she began to teach children. Mrs. Thompson paid particular attention to Teddy. As she worked with him, his mind seemed to come alive. The more she encouraged him, the faster he responded. By the end of the year, Teddy had become one of the smartest children in the class and, despite her lie that she would love all the children the same, Teddy became one of her "teacher's pets.."

A year later, she found a note under her door, from Teddy, telling* her that she was still the best teacher he ever had in his whole life.

Six years went by before she got another note from Teddy. He then wrote that he had finished high school, third in his class, and she was still the best teacher he ever had in life.

Four years after that, she got another letter, saying that while things had been tough at times, he'd stayed in school, had stuck with it, and would soon graduate from college with the highest of honors. He assured Mrs. Thompson that she was still the best and favorite teacher he had ever had in his whole life.

Then four more years passed and yet another letter came. This time he explained that after he got his bachelor's degree, he decided to go a little further. The letter explained that she was still the best and favorite teacher he ever had. But now his name was a little longer.... The letter was signed, Theodore F. Stoddard, MD.

The story does not end there. You see, there was yet another letter that spring. Teddy said he had met this girl and was going to be married. He explained that his father had died a couple of years ago and he was wondering if Mrs. Thompson might agree to sit at the wedding in the place that was usually reserved for the mother of the groom.

Of course, Mrs. Thompson did. And guess what? She wore that bracelet, the one with several rhinestones missing. Moreover, she made sure she was wearing the perfume that Teddy remembered his mother wearing on their last Christmas together.

They hugged each other, and Dr. Stoddard whispered in Mrs. Thompson's ear, "Thank you Mrs. Thompson for* believing in me. Thank you so much for making me feel important and showing me that I could make a difference."

Mrs. Thompson, with tears in her eyes, whispered back. She said, "Teddy, you have it all wrong. You were the one who taught me that I could make a difference. I didn't know how to teach until I met you."
Just try to make a difference in someone's life today? tomorrow? Just "do it". 

Liked reading the above story. Felt Krsna consciousness - Changing people's hearts for ever and giving people hope of a better life for ever.

Friday, 18 October 2013

Austerity

Karthik month started and everyone is busy taking austerities. I enquired few of my god brothers and sisters on their austerity for this month, I heard many of them telling like waking up for Mangala arti, chanting the rounds in the morning, reading bhagavatam, completing a canto within this month, hearing GM lecture every day, one meal a day, no sweets…etc. It striked me in the morning while doing MA, why are these called austerities , when devotional service is suppose to be done blissfully. I explored the meaning of austere and to how Prabhupada  explains devotional service as austerity.
First the dictionary meaning

aus·tere
adjective \ȯ-ˈstir also -ˈster\
: simple or plain : not fancy
of a person : having a serious and unfriendly quality: having few pleasures : simple and harsh
Full Definition of AUSTERE
1
a :  stern and cold in appearance or manner
b :  sombergrave <an austere critic>
2
:  morally strict :  ascetic
3
:  markedly simple or unadorned <an austere office> <an austere style of writing>
4
:  giving little or no scope for pleasure <austere diets>

Srila Prabhupada says

Divyam is explained in the Bhagavad-gita: janma karma ca me divyam [Bg. 4.9]. If you simply take little trouble to understand Krsna... That tapasya required: to read Krsna's instruction, Bhagavad-gita, Srimad-Bhagavatam, and try to understand Krsna. Because that tapasya, if you take little painful... It is not painful. It is very pleasing. But we avoid it. We think it is painful. "Ah! Who is going to read books? We are meant for selling books, not for reading books." This is not good. We should read also. That is tapasya. Saddhaya. That is tapasya. Don't think that simply our books are meant for selling. No. It is meant for reading also. If we read regularly, at least two hours, three hours, that is tapasya. Tapo divyam [SB 5.5.1]. To understand spiritual position, my spiritual position, Krsna's spiritual... (aside:) So that is tapasya. These are the tapasyas. To rise early in the morning, that is also tapasya. Not that every day we have to ring bell -- dung, dung, dung, dung -- "Get up! Get up!" "No, I am sleeping." No, you have to accept. These are the tapasyas. We cannot avoid. If we actually want to avoid this body, working like cats and dogs, like animals, then we have to undergo tapasya, a very simple tapasya.


So Krsna consciousness is not a sacrifice it’s the tapasya for our eternal happiness , REAL HAPPINESS . Wish I do some tapasya this month and get multi folded benefits. J  

Wednesday, 16 October 2013

Feeling loved...

karuṇā nā hoile, kāndiyā kāndiyā,
prāṇa nā rākhibo āra

Have been relishing GM's mercy on me.O Krsna ! How can he love me so unconditionally though Im a big sack of anarthas...By Jagannath's mercy I wish I carry this mood with me always.I am glad that my gurumaharaj is always there for me..loving me and caring for me..feeling so indebted.



Monday, 3 June 2013

Natabara Nitai Gour's FIRST Birthday.

June 03 2012 was when they came to us on a Smriti Panihatti festival. After 100+ devotees did their first abhishek for them, they travelled with us to Caitanya Nitai desh spreading their mercy. Morning we did Kirtan to the Lordship and heard GM lecture on Caitanya mahaprabhu's mahaprakasha lila. They had their usual breakfast and lunch.

Evening I started around 6 from office, picked up vegetables, fruits, groceries, decoration things for them and reached home at 7:30 PM. Jagannath's mercy I was quick enough to finish making cup cake (thanks to sudhamayi mj for the mould) , pasta, pav bhaji , mango milk shake in 40 mins time.


It was fun decorating the altar for their birthday. This is the first time I ever decorated for a birthday, though it was not great, I loved it.




Can you see the toffees for them :) and balloons hanging ?  I hope they liked it. Gpp joined me late , helped me in tying balloons and he offered them dinner.

Whole year they had been wearing new dresses most of the week. But Wish I had stitched a new dress for them for today. I tried it over weekends, may be my desire was not so good..it never turned up. Sorry Gour Nitai.

I thoroughly enjoyed my time with them today. BLISSFUL day it was.. 

All glories to Sri Sri Natabara Nitai gour.!
All glories to Srila Prabhupada,
All glories to my beloved father ! Jai Gurudeva .

Sunday, 19 May 2013

Srimati Sita Devi (consort of Lord Sri Rama) -- Appearance day special









My first dress to the Lordship. Its neither perfect nor beautiful but with Love and Love....and they mercifully accepted my service on Srimati Sita Devi (consort of Lord Sri Rama) -- Appearance day .

Ram Lakshman Janaki, Jai bolo Hanuman ki !

Jai Jagannath Baladev and Subadra ma !
Jai Natabara Nitai Gaura !
Jai Prabhupada !
Jai Gurudeva !



Thursday, 16 May 2013

No dull moment with Gurudev


It was just an awesome 3 days with Gurudev in CaitanyaNitai desh. The initial trip of his was postponed by a week because of his health. This visit of his I really felt like my JBS and NBNG have sent me for a rehabilitation crash course.Lots of realisation, lots of action points which I noted down for myself.  Monday we heard from GM on Akshaya trithiya. Tulasi maharani's  glories was the highlight. (Do you know you get 1 crore time benefit if you chant in front of Tulasi ? )

Tuesday was nectar, we had continous classes. Bhanu maharaj spoke on GBC, Guru, Temple Authority and Disciple relationship. Folllowed by a very crispy class on 10 offenses. (Two of it which was so striking was - Attachment is opposite to surrender, If you chant Nama with offenses crossing Anartha Nivridhi stage will take a longer time) Mahavaraha pb spoke on Guru Tattva (with dog example) and finally GM spoke on offenses. Thanks to Krsna, he is not chopping our head with Sudarshana when we commit 100 offenses like how he did to Sishupal. That night (Second day) I also stayed in the house where GM was staying and I was meditating so much that I should improve my DS . Whatever I missed to pray in Mayapur dham ( desire tree dham), I prayed at that house bcos Gurudev was there. I dint speak to him. But I heard him.

Guru's mercy is unlimited and so is his service. Though nothing was planned on my service, my beloved gurudev was merciful enough to engage me in his service and taught me lots of lessons. I cooked, cleaned the room, vessels, made garlands, distributed books, served his servants. Many of my God brothers and God sisters were inspiring. They taught me Do's and Dont's. Surprisingly this time, I  enjoyed every minute and there was no dull moment.

Final touch was when GM had asked GPP..what is your wife's name ? Guru Seva ?? and GPP completed it :) So much love he has for me. He knows that I love to hear my name from him.

Love you Gurudev ! Please bless me that I remain faithful to you, following the vows I promised, chanting 16 rounds and eternally be engaged in your service blissfully.

Sunday, 3 February 2013

Locan das thakur ki Jai


Dint know why but I was hearing this song and was singing this song from morning and later realised that it was Locan das thakur's disappearance day. All glories to my Nattabara Nitai Gour. All glories to Locan das thakur.

LYRICS
(1)
parama karuṇapahū dui jana
nitāi gauracandra
saba avatāra-sāra śiromaṇi
kevala ānanda-kanda

(2)
bhajo bhajo bhāicaitanya nitāi
sudṛḍha biśwāsa kori
viṣaya chāḍiyā, se rase majiyā,
mukhe bolo hari hari

(3)
dekho ore bhāi, tri-bhuvane nāi,
emona doyāla dātā
paśu pākhī jhurepāṣāṇa vidare,
śunijāńra guṇa-gāthā

(4)
saḿsāre majiyārohili poriyā,
se pade nahilo āśa
āpana karamabhuñjāye śamana,
kahoye locana-dāsa

Purport by Srila Prabhupada

Parama koruṇapahū dui jananitāi gauracandra. This is a song by Locana dāsa Ṭhākura, a great devotee and ācārya of the Gauḍīya-sampradāya. He is declaring that pahū duijanaPahū means lords. Dui jana means two. Who are the two lords? Nitai Gauracandra. One is Lord NitāiNityānanda; another is Lord Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu. So he says that "These two Lords are very merciful.'' Parama koruṇapahū dui janaParama koruṇa means very merciful. Nitai GauracandraSaba avatārasāra śiromaṇiAvatāra means incarnation, and saba means all. "They are the essence of all incarnations.'' Saba avatārasāra śiromaṇikevala ānanda-kanda: "And the specific significance of these incarnations is that to prosecute their ways of self-realization is simply joyful,'' ānanda-kanda. They introduced chanting and dancing. No other incarnation There are many incarnation, just like Lord Rāma. Even Kṛṣṇa, He taught Bhagavad-gītā. That requires knowledge, understanding. But here Lord CaitanyaNityānanda, introduced some process which is simply joyful: simply chant and dance. Kevala ānanda-kanda. Saba avatārasāra śiromaṇikevala ānanda-kanda.

Therefore he requests everyone, bhajo bhajo bhāicaitanya nitāi: "My dear brothers, I request you. Just you worship Lord Caitanya and Nityānanda.'' Sudṛḍha biśwāsa kori': "With firm conviction and faith.'' Don't think that this chanting and dancing will not lead you to the desired goal. It will because there is assurance of Lord Caitanya Mahāprabhuthat you will get all perfection by this process. Therefore Locana dāsa Ṭhākura says that "You must have firm faith and conviction.'' It will act. Bhajo bhajo bhāicaitanya nitāi,sudṛḍha. Sudṛḍha means firm. Biśwāsa kori', with faith and conviction. But what is the process? The process is viṣaya chāḍiyā, se rase majiyā. If you want to be Kṛṣṇa conscious under that process, then you have to give up your engagement of sense gratification. That is the only restriction. You cannot do that. Then it will be very nice. If you give up sense gratification and come to this stage, then it is sure that you will reach to the desired goal. Viṣaya chāḍiya, se rase majiyāmukhe bolo hari hari: "And you have to simply chant Hare Kṛṣṇa, 'Hari Hari,' that's all, without any motive of sense gratification.''

Dekho dekho bhāi, tri-bhuvane nāi. He says, "My dear brothers, you just try and examine that within these three worlds there is nobody like Lord Caitanya or NityānandaPrabhu.'' Because, paśu pākhī jhurepāṣāṇa vidare: "Their mercy and qualities are so great that even birds and beasts, they are crying, what to speak of human being?'' Actually, when Lord Caitanya Mahāprabhu passed through the forest of Jhārigrāma, the tigers, the elephants, the snake, the deer, all joined Him in chanting Hare Kṛṣṇa. It is so nice. Anyone can join. Animals can join, what to speak of human being? Of course, it is not possible for ordinary man to enthuse animals to chant, but Caitanya Mahāprabhudid it actually. So even if we cannot enthuse animals, we can enthuse at least human being to this path of Hare Kṛṣṇa mantra chanting. Paśu pākhī jhurepāṣāṇa vidare. And it is so nice that even the most stonehearted men will be melted. Pāṣāṇa vidare. Pāṣāṇa means stone, and vidarePāṣāṇa, even stone, will melt. It is so nice. But he regrets that,viṣaya majiyā: "Being entrapped by sense gratification...'' Viṣaya majiyārohili bhuliyā. He's addressing himself, "My dear mind, you are entrapped in the sense gratification process and you have no attraction for chanting Hare Kṛṣṇa.''

Viṣaya bhuliyārohili majiyā, se pade nahilo āśa: "You have no attraction for the lotus feet of Caitanya-Nityānanda. So what can I say? It is only...'' Āpana karamabhuñjāyaśamana: "I can simply think of my misfortune only that Yamaraja, the superintendent of death, he is punishing me in this way, that he is not allowing me to be attracted to this movement.'' This is the statement of Kahoye locana-dāsa: "This is the statement of Locana dāsa Ṭhākura.''

Monday, 21 January 2013

Twenty-six Qualities of Vaishnava


These qualities of a devotee, twenty-six in number, are listed as follows: (1) kind to everyone, (2) does not quarrel with anyone, (3) fixed in the Absolute Truth, (4) equal to everyone, (5) faultless, (6) charitable, (7) mild, (8) clean, (9) simple, (10) benevolent, (11) peaceful, (12) completely attached to Kṛṣṇa, (13) has no material hankering, (14) meek, (15) steady, (16) self-controlled, (17) does not eat more than required, (18) sane, (19) respectful, (20) humble, (21) grave, (22) compassionate, (23) friendly, (24) poetic, (25) expert, (26) silent. 

Reference - http://vedabase.net/sb/4/20/16/en 

Thursday, 3 January 2013

Thank you 2012


Nattabara Nitai Gaura,Jagannath Baladev and Subadra. My lovely spiritual fathers blessings and association , sweet devotees, Nrsimha Chaturdasi, Balaram Jayanthi, Janmashtami, Radhashtami..JBS installation, 2 nice Mayapur trip, wonderful divya desam trip with my brothers and sisters, my TTP is done :), Jagannath Rathyatra....New job, New office, New car, New mobile , New friends,

Last day of the year also had a real sweet surprise for me. I got in touch with one of my school friend through Facebook.I admired her a lot but we lost touch when she moved to pondy during 10th standard. Somehow all these days I was looking out for her contact through my friends, orkut etc but dint work out. She was in US and she said she is back to India for good.Thanks to Facebook.

Hoping for a better Krsna conscious year 2013.